November 25, 2020

Pan’s Top 30 Most Disappointing Videos Part 3/3

10. SSNI-102

“The Unwitting Temptation of Her Breasts and Pussy Perfectly Outlined in the Body Line of Her Tight Fitting Maxi Dress”

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Finally getting into the top 10 with maybe a surprise pick but a deserving one nonetheless. SSNI-102 features a simple premise revolving around Nami wearing tight dresses and having sex. Its a little bit like the “no bra/bra-less wife” series as she mostly gets fucked by random guys who can’t resist her ass. Now I was 110% sold just on the cover alone. After all it’s one of the best covers I’ve seen in recent memory. However the video is pretty mediocre for several reasons. One such reason is her acting. Nami has never been known to be a great performer and that trend continues here. She’s so painfully underwhelming with low energy, lackluster facial expressions and the fact that she’s submissive throughout the whole video pretty much. Moving on the sex isn’t quite what I was hoping for either. Not a ton of ass focus like I was wanting personally, a bland paizuri scene and the last sex scene features a ton of lube poured all over her body which I really don’t care for. So all in all this video is held back by disappointing action and a very underwhelming performance. Great potential gone to waste with this one.

 

9. STAR-993

“Marina Shiraishi Enjoy Titty Sucking Baby Play As She Gently Says To You, Let Me Help You Get Off”

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Normally Marina and POV go together like peanut butter and jelly such as in STAR-665 and STAR-905. However that’s not the case here sadly. STAR-993 features one of the most bizarre plots for a pov title I’ve ever come across. This one is all about “baby play” as you portray an infant, at least I think. It’s very weird even for jav. I don’t know if this is a fetish for someone but I wasn’t the biggest fan of it. Anyway I can overlook that if the action is good at least but even that misses the mark, by a lot actually. Starting out with the sex scenes of which there are 3 of them. Not bad except that two of the scenes feature just one single position, cowgirl. The filler scenes are terrible too but utterly forgettable paizur and handjob scenes. In addition the lighting is waaay too damn bright looking like the sun is going supernova outside at times and some scenes take too long to get going. Now I will say her performance is quite good as you’d expect from Marina as she’s bubbly, warm and inviting here. Also she looks terrific as well. She goes for the “milf” look and absolutely nails it. Even wearing a pair of jeans that look very sexy on her. Still though the action is just so, so bad with little to nothing worth watching that even some good acting can’t save it. Even worse it that this is Marina’s last video as of now. Please come back Marina…

 

8. SNIS-688

“A Delivery Health Sex Service That Will Go Anywhere You Ask!”

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My expectations for this video were pretty high, after all, Aika Yumeno’s entry in this series is my all time favorite video for her personally. But this one doesn’t even come close to matching her entry. It’s premise centers around Aoi generally having sex with “random” men by picking them up off the street or in a manga/video store. Generally the same setup but its execution falls flat imo. The first sex scene, for the most part, is pretty solid. However it goes downhill after that with an average outercourse scene and two completely awful sex scenes. For one they both use the same exact setting which is a private booth. But the problem is the camerawork in which the first scene uses fixed camera angles which are downright awful and ruin the scene completely. The scene after it uses more dynamic camera shots but still uses the same booth with mediocre lighting and angles. Beyond that her performance is subpar with a few nice moments here and there. And lastly her appearance is fine but nothing super memorable. I expected much better from this one as it could have been a top 10 pick for her but instead it lands on this list at #8.

 

“I Normally Can’t Cum But She Made Me Blow 10 Loads – The Soapland Hooker With Incredible Technique SPECIAL”

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On paper you may think that this specific collab could work. Perhaps just by having Ai Uehara with her maybe Aimi will step up her acting. Or maybe we’ll get some great interaction between the pair. Well that’s couldn’t be more wrong sadly. The video itself is a straightforward basic soapland themed release. Lemme get the positives out of the way first. They both look pretty great overall and Ai’s performance at least is solid. But this video has one of my biggest pet peeves of a collab video. There’s next to no interaction between them. They don’t touch each other at all really. For example in one scene Aimi is giving a bj while Ai is just sitting off on the side, fingering herself. It’s such a complete waste. In addition Aimi’s performance is quite average and doesn’t impress at all. This film also suffers from a flaw of soapland videos in general that always put me off, slow pacing. There’s a lot of time devoted to Aimi and Ai just rubbing themselves on the guy leading to a bloated runtime. All in all there’s very little reason to watch this. Even if you’re a die-hard fan of both this video is a giant waste of time.

 

6. EKW-022

“We’ll Lend You The Key To This Masochist Man’s Apartment”

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I’m generally a big fan of this premise that tasks actresses with visiting “fans” in their homes and performing with them. One with Kaori especially should be a no brainer but alas EKW-022 drops the ball, hard. Anyway the premise is of course Kaori meeting “fans” and engaging in sex acts with them all. The one unique aspect being that Kaori plays a more dominant role here, more so than usual. Again much like the previous video on paper this sounds terrific but the execution is flat out terrible. It’s a real shame because the premise is fantastic and Kaori honestly look very good here. Also there’s some real nice facesitting too. So what’s the problem here? Well its the fact that out of the 120 min runtime there is literally 5 min of sex. That’s right, 5 whole minutes at the very end is all you get. The rest is just a glorified handjob and blowjob scene respectively. The action is dry and dull it completely ruins this otherwise solid film. Doesn’t really matter if Kaori looks good and her acting is solid if the sex is virtually non-existent. Save your time and don’t bother with this. You won’t miss much.

 

5. PPPD-418

“My Girlfriend’s Big Sister Tempts Me With Her Big Tits And Creampies”

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A Sakura Kirishima GES video? How could that possibly go wrong? Well lemme tell ya. Much like the rest of the series it primarily focuses on Sakura playing the lewd sister who seduces her sister’s boyfriend. Pretty par for the course in that aspect. But where this entry goes wrong is once again, execution. There’s really not as much risk involved in the scenes besides a few key moments which is unfortunate as that’s a big draw for this series. Also the camerawork feels off as well. Another negative is her appearance. Now don’t get me wrong her body and boobs of course look fantastic. But her haircut here is just awful. This very short haircut doesn’t suit her at all and honestly kinda ruins the whole video for me almost as it sticks out like a sore thumb. Despite all this negativity I can say that her performance is good at least. Pretty good enthusiasm across the board and she plays her part quite well. In closing this is by far one of my least favorite entries in this series and I can say with confidence that its best to just skip this one.

 

4. MIAA-021

“Today We’re Gonna Tweak Your Nipples To Oblivion!! We’re Kneading And Groping These Slut Babes To Orgasmic Ecstasy! Pull Out Teasing! Perpetual Pussy Pounding Sex”

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On paper this collab should have been a home-run. Pairing these two together like how could you go wrong? Two actresses with two of the best asses in jav at the moment. Well you’ll see soon enough. The general focus here is on nipple play and of course threesomes. One of the major reasons why this film is such a disappointment is the first aspect there. Personally I don’t care for nipple play at all but I can live with some of it here and there. However with MIAA-021 the ENTIRE video focuses on it. So as you’d expect much of the attention is on the actresses licking, kissing and playing with the actor’s nipples throughout. It just doesn’t do anything for me and is incredibly dull. Not to mention it drags out the scenes as well. But maybe you think “well at least there’s some great interaction between Kurea and Yuu right?” Nope, not at all. They don’t do anything to each other or even really acknowledge one another. During all the threesome scenes instead of groping or kissing each other they instead just pinch the dude’s nipples. Had this video gone the REAL-575 route(with Kurea and Yuki Jin) this would have been a 10/10 video perhaps. After all the acting between them is solid and they look great too. But the general theme and action is a complete miss and ruins any potential this film had.

 

3. PPPD-462

“Her Elder Sister Uses Her Big Tits To Seduce Me, Telling Me I Can Cum Inside Her!”

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Aimi starring in one of my personal favorite series? How could this go wrong? Well lemme tell you. The plot is just the same as always with this series as it centers around Aimi seducing and fucking her sister’s boyfriend. Sounds good so far. Plus Aimi looks really good here too. Her body, hair and wardrobe are all on point and look stunning. But where this falls apart is in it’s execution and her performance. Firstly the action is a huge letdown as there’s really one scene with any sort of real risk to it. That’s easily the main draw for the series and without it the sex scenes just feel plain and vanilla. And the other big negative has to be her performance. She ends up being too whiny throughout most of the scenes and especially in the last one wheres she’s having sex in bed right next to her sister. All this while moaning loudly like an ambulance. It just ruins the scene completely and eliminates any belief. It would have been great to see Aimi step up her acting and really deliver a strong performance here but it just doesn’t happen at all. Couple that with underwhelming action and you’ve got a real dud.

 

2. JUFD-553

“Strongest Big Black Cock Orgasms! Harlem Threesome Colossal Tits Group Special Yumi Kazama Azumi Chino”

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By far one of the biggest bamboozles I’ve ever come across in jav. That’s one hell of a cover and the general premise sounds amazing. Azumi Chino and Yumi Kazama together in a threesome interracial film. Personally I’m a big fan of this genre so I was pretty hyped to check this one out. For starters their performances here are terrific as they are very enthusiastic and have great chemistry together. Just a ton of fun to watch and in addition they both look outstanding. Not only do they wear some super sexy outfits but physically they’re both in near perfect shape. They make one hell of a milf pairing. Technically even the action itself is fantastic with plenty of threesome sex scenes and some great positions. So what’s the issue you may ask. Well the issue is that the dicks are all fake. That’s right they actors use a huge fake dick complete with fake cum. It’s mind boggling why Fitch went this route when they’ve done legit interracial films before. It absolutely ruins the video imo. It’s hard to enjoy it when they’re just fucking dildos pretty much. Had this featured actual real dicks this would be one for the ages but instead ends up as one the biggest and most puzzling disappoints ever.

 

1. MIDE-295

“I and J Big Tits and the Smallest Waists in a Double Harlem Fuck!!”

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And now we finally arrive at number one. My personal choice for the biggest disappointment in jav, MIDE-295. This film came out in 2015 shortly after MIRD-150 so here I was thinking we’re in for another masterpiece potentially. But unfortunately it wasn’t even close. There’s no central plot to speak of here as it’s just various scenes, each with a slightly unique theme. Now lemme just say that this film isn’t a complete trainwreck by any means and does in fact have some decent scenes. The first scene which is a pov sex scene is fantastic and their acting is great too. And there’s a solid paizuri scene as well. Another positive that they look amazing here as they’re both in superb shape. So what’s wrong here? Well one huge negative is the lack of interaction between the pair. They rarely, if at all, acknowledge each other here. No groping, kissing or anything of that matter. It’s such a giant wasted opportunity. The other misstep here is the action. Some of it is just straight up awful such as a scene where they get their tits covered in pink lotion and tittyfuck a dildo together. Besides that there’s a bland outercourse scene and a terrible, messy group sex scene at the end. In the end MIDE-295 falls short of it’s incredible potential and leaves you wondering what could have been.

 

 

 

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