June 26, 2022

Pan’s Top 30 Most Disappointing Videos Part 2/3

20. CJOD-163

“Squeaky Clean Ass Play with the Lady at the Bath

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This video isn’t all bad but with a cover like that you’re expecting something much more and instead you get a barely average video. Its a pretty straightforward video with Yuu playing a bathhouse girl helping take care of her customers. The video gets off to a great start with a fantastic first scene. However after that its mostly downhill. The next scenes are an utterly forgettable outercourse scene, a bland sex with her keeping her clothes on, another average outercourse scene and lastly a somewhat okay sex scene. Often times the camerawork is disappointing and doesn’t capture the best angles of the action. Also they use some of the most obvious looking fake cum that I’ve ever seen. Again it’s not a terrible video at all but personally I was pretty hyped for this release and ultimately came away disappointed.

19. IPX-152

“Cherry Boy Sex! I’ll give you the best (first-time) sex of your life! Destroying cherry boys! Come on Dotei (Virgin)s!! Tsubasa Amami”

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I’m a big fan of this genre so I was expecting great things from this video. The plot follows Tsubasa Amami visiting fans in their homes and taking their virginity. Now how well a video like this does is usually attributed to the actress’s performance and in this case her acting isn’t quite up too par imo. Her energy and enthusiasm at times could be better and she’s not as expressive as you’d like to see here. Also the sex itself is just average at best and the use of condoms is a bit disappointing with no proper cumshot. However I can say that she looks great and those fishnets are super sexy. That being said though I was still underwhelmed by this release and definitely was expecting a bit more here. At best it’s a barely average video.

18. EBOD-478

“Beautiful Big Tits Cosplayer’s First Creampie Orgy Meetup”

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EBOD-478 boasts a fantastic cover but does the video live up to it? Well as you can probably guess, not really. The whole premise centers around her playing a cosplayer who engages in sex acts with her fans and photographers during photoshoots/meetups. Now I can definitely say Tia looks stunning here and her various costumes all look amazing. But personally I don’t like this plot direction when it comes to cosplay jav. I wanted the scenes to take place in the universe of said cosplay. The action itself is fine but nothing too memorable. And the other unfortunate aspect here is her underwhelming acting. Her facial expressions and energy are lacking at times and it overall leads to a dull performance.

17. JUY-335

“Madonna Exclusive No.2!! Yumi Kazama In A Visit To Fukuoka A Nookie Galore Fan Thanksgiving Day!!”

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A fan thanksgiving film starring Yumi Kazama should be a guaranteed success but unfortunately it doesn’t quite deliver the goods. As you can probably guess the central premise revolves around her visiting fans in their homes and in a dvd store. Now what  I can say is that her performance is solid but that’s about it. I hate to say it but her appearance and body have seen better days imo. But the more than that the action is incredibly lackluster and suffers from some of the worst censoring I’ve ever seen. I say that because in the scene at the dvd store they blur out literally everything but Yumi and the actor’s bodies. It’s awful and completely ruins the scene. The other scenes border on forgettable and average. Definitely leaves you wanting more.

16. SNIS-951

“Secret Lovers The No.1 Dojinshi Comic In A Real CG Live Action Adaptation!!”

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I remember seeing the cover for this film when it was revealed and getting pretty hyped for it. But when it comes down to it the film misses the mark in nearly every way. I’m not gonna explain the plot too much because honestly its pretty ridiculous but just know that its based off of a hentai doujinshi. It’s all very silly and for me it just didn’t click. But it doesn’t stop there. The action is pretty mediocre itself with utterly lackluster sex scenes and one of the worst uses of fake cum I’ve seen in any video. I get that they’re going for that over the top live-action hentai feel but it just doesn’t translate well. Beyond that her performance is terrible. No energy, no enthusiasm and barely any engagement from her at all. Just a flat and awful performance in nearly every way. While she does wear a few nice outfits and she’s in good shape physically that’s nowhere near enough to save this disappointing film. Don’t be fooled by the cover, it’s not worth your time.

15. PPPD-636

“Super Colossal Tits Cosplayer Creampie Gang Bang

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14. AVOP-301

“LEGEND IMPRESSION The Strongest Content, A Miraculous All Star Combination!”

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I remember seeing this be announced for the AV Open back in 2017. Two of the most renown IP actresses together in a collab video should be a home-run right? Not quite. Now I will say it’s not all bad as there’s a few scenes that are fine and worth watching. But overall it misses the mark for me personally. One of those reasons being the lack of interaction between the pair. While once in awhile they play with each other and what not most of the time they don’t really engage all that much. The action itself is hit-or-miss too. There’s fair variety in the scenes at least but quite a few of them fall flat for one reason or another. So to summarize why this is underwhelming: so-so performances, lack of engagement between them and hit-or-miss action.

13. MIDE-506

“For VIPs Only An Ultra High-Class See-Through Underground Sex Club”

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Certainly an eye catching cover right? Sounds like a decent premise too with Julia wearing a bunch of sexy see-through outfits. Well all that goes to a waste in one of her most disappointing videos in recent memory. There are many reasons why but I’ll start off with her performance. Across the board her acting is mediocre and at best just average. Next up is a cardinal sin of jav imo. That being the cover outfit that draws you in, is just used in an incredibly bland and forgettable fingering type scene that lasts about 15 min. But by far my least favorite aspect here is the super dim lighting through the entire film. I know some may like it but personally I like to see what’s going on and nearly every scene looks like it was lit with just the light from the camera or a single lamp in the corner. MIDE-506 is a great example of cover bamboozle. Don’t be fooled.

12. BDA-041

“Black Impact The Female Sniper

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I just mentioned cover bamboozles earlier and this is not only that but also a title bamboozle as well. You look at the cover and see the title, “Black Impact”, and probably think this is Yui’s first interracial video. Well you would be wrong. In all my years of watching jav this may be one of the dumbest and pointless bamboozles ever. There’s no black guys here at all. Instead its just some typical Asian guys with shades on to cover their eyes and they just rub charcoal on their skin to darker it a bit. That’s literally it and its downright laughable. Why’d they even do a concept like this thinking they could fool anyone is beyond me. The video itself isn’t that great anyway. It’s a pretty rapey video with Yui being quite submissive in her acting. There’s nothing redeeming here and I struggle to think of any reason why someone would want to watch this.

11. SSNI-409

“The Female Undercover Investigator. Aphrodisiac And Brutal Torture Special”

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The cover bamboozles just don’t stop here. Easily one of Yua’s best looking covers to date but unfortunately it’s tied to one of my least favorite and disappointing series. I’m sure most of you reading this know of this series already. Yua plays a secret investigator who gets captured and raped. If there’s one major reason why this film lands here its the complete wasted opportunity as this film could have been a home-run had it gone in the other direction. I think I speak for most when I say we’d all much rather see her play a dominant secret agent. But instead she gets fucked against her will throughout the whole thing. The action at the very least is solid but the lighting isn’t too great as it’s all very dim. Another frustrating, wasted aspect is her appearance. This may be the best range of outfits she’s ever worn in a video. Tight leather, latex and catsuits from beginning to end. But those are all wasted here due to the rapey plot. The general idea of this series is great but goddamn why do the studios always take it into the rape direction. Had Yua been in command and taking control instead no doubt this would be an all time Yua great. Instead it’s a giant waste that’s best left forgotten.

 

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